Thursday, April 12, 2012

Number 18 : Bernice Liu (廖碧兒)

I don't know why you would name your kid Bernice. Or Mabel. Or Gertrude. Or Mildred. Mildred just sounds like Judge Dredd to me. Which is a movie I never saw, but I intended to. And thanks to that movie, names like Fergee and Rico and Bernice are popular again. Or maybe that's just in Hong Kong. Or Canada. Where apparently there are a lot of Chinese. I never knew Canada had anything other than maple syrup and moose, but apparently there are a lot of moose eating Kung Pao chicken. But, if that's what it takes to have a super hot Chinese girl, then I really don't care if she's named Bernice or Bessie or Beavis. Because it's not like I'm really going to be screaming out her name during sex again anyway. Because I made that mistake once already. Make a note of that Hilary Clinton. Thanks to you, I'll never scream out any name in bed. If it makes any difference, I was thinking about Bernice the whole time I was with you. And I think of her every time I eat Kung Pao chicken too for some reason.

 
 

Facebook: http://www.facebook.com/pages/Bernice-Liu-Official-Fan-Page
MySpace: http://www.myspace.com/therealbernice_liu
Tumblr: http://www.tumblr.com/tagged/bernice-liu
Twitter: https://twitter.com/#!/bernice106
Webio: http://www.weibo.com/bernice106
Website: http://www.berniceliu.hk/
Wiki: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bernice_Liu
Wiki: http://zh.wikipedia.org/wiki/廖碧兒
Wiki: http://ms.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bernice_Liu

Thursday, February 16, 2012

Number 19 : Shizuka Takeda (武田静加)

I've always wondered what it would be like to 69 a girl that has a long torso and short legs. I almost did it a few weeks ago, but the roofie kicked in before she got out of the bathroom. I really don't get what the big fascination with roofies are. I mean I keep on taking them, and I usually pass out before I even get my pants off. And then when I wake up, I usually have some money or vital organs missing. I wonder if there is a guide for doing roofies on the web somewhere? I mean should I stop doing them with Absinthe chasers? I just figured that would get me to the next level...without choking myself with a noose or something. But now, back to Shizuka. She is effing hot. And her blog IS picture heavy. I think it took me the entire months of July and August just to get through it. And I still haven't spanked it to all her posts. So take that Michibata. And, Shizuka is another one of the Happie Nuts girls. Hehe. She makes my nuts happy. Then she makes them hurt a little. Then she makes them cry. Then they get happy again. And a little sweaty. And then tired. And maybe if I play my cards right, I can finally see what a 69 would be like with Shizuka.


Blog: http://ameblo.jp/buzzshizuka 
Livejournal: http://deconut.livejournal.com (No update since 2010)
Twitter: https://twitter.com/#!/takedashizuka
Tumblr: http://www.tumblr.com/tagged/shizuka-takeda
Wiki: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Happie_Nuts
Wretch: http://www.wretch.cc/blog/aimerfeeltw/32823909

Saturday, February 4, 2012

Number 20 : Jessica Gomes (제시카 고메즈)

So is it Gomes like gnomes? Or Gom-es like Pez or lez? I've heard her introduce herself as both. But whatever she wants to call herself, I call her smoking hot. And when I say smoking, I mean like the steam that comes off our bodies when I'm done with her, not like the cancer causing kind of smoking. I used to really be into girls that smoke, because my old boss at the Ponderosa used to say "They smoke, they poke." And they did! But after awhile I got sick of sitting in the smoking section at the movie theater, and tasting an ashtray when I went down on them. So I don't like that so much anymore. But girls that chew tabakky...now that is hot! There is nothing better than a girl with a big wad in her mouth. I mean other than my junk. And my wad after I've shot it. The problem with girls that chew is that they are so used to spitting, it just comes second nature to them. So they don't even think about swallowing. And that's why I like Jessica Gomes. The End.

 
 
 

Facebook: http://www.facebook.com/iamjessicagomes
SI.com: http://sportsillustrated.cnn.com
Tumblr: http://www.tumblr.com/tagged/jessica+gomes
Twitter: https://twitter.com/#!/iamjessicagomes
Wiki: http://ko.wikipedia.org/wiki/제시카고메즈

Saturday, January 28, 2012

Number 21 : Ella Koon (官恩娜)

Oh Ella Koon. She makes me swoon. When she acts like a baboon. She's tall like a loon. I want to lick her balloons. And lay down with her in a cocoon.  - And that folks, is why I never became a famous song writer. But seriously, there is something about gorgeous, tall, Asian girls that have an innocent yet dopey look to them. It makes me think they will be excited and surprised at anything I say or do. Like if I pulled a quarter out of her ear, she would be so amazed and wonder where it came from. And the same thing would happen when I take off my pants and she sees my junk. And then the same thing would happen when I jam it in her. And then when she climaxes, again, and again, and again. And yes, the sky in my world is rainbow colors and I swim around in marshmallow pools all day. And that makes Ella want to do a little Tahitian dance for me. I'm doing a little one man dance right now. And I'm shaking my tiki torch, if you know what I mean. And if you don't, I'm spanking it.

 
 
 

Afspot: http://afspot.net/gallery
Alivenotdead: http://www.alivenotdead.com/ellakoon
Blog: http://blog.yahoo.com
Facebook: http://www.facebook.com/EllaKoonOfficialFanPage (It's a fan page if you couldn't tell)
GoDaddy: http://videos.godaddy.com/ella-koon.aspx?ci=39368
Official Blog: http://jacso.hk/ellakoon
Tumblr: http://www.tumblr.com/tagged/ella-koon
Twitter: https://twitter.com/#!/ellakoonqmb
Website: http://www.ella.asia
Weibo: http://www.weibo.com/ellakoon
Wiki: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ella_Koon

Sunday, January 8, 2012

Number 22 : Jessica Michibata (道端ジェシカ)

Dear Jessica,
I want to see you naked. I want to rub my hands up and down your body. I want to see your ass. I want to wear your ass as a hat. I want to watch you brush your teeth. I want you to dress up like Mrs. Roper and call me Jack Tripper. I want to see you in a funky Indian Kama Sutra pose with me, but I hope you have less hair. (Indians are hairy.) I want you to pretend I'm a race car driver and you're an underwear model. I want you to press your boobs on the back window of the car that I'm riding in. I want you to pretend I'm a washing machine and sit on me while I have a seizure underneath you. I want you to dress up like a horse and I'll dress up like the rancher that is going to fuck you one last time before I need to put you down and send you to the glue factory because you broke your leg. I want you to put on your 3 prong strap-on and give me mushroom bruises up and down my body.  - And that gentlemen, is how you write a love letter.

 
 

Blog: http://blog.honeyee.com/jessica
Facebook: http://www.facebook.com/pages/Jessica-Michibata
Myspace: http://www.myspace.com/jessicamichibata
Tumblr: http://www.tumblr.com/tagged/jessica+michibata
Twitter: https://twitter.com/#!/jessybondgirl
Wiki: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Jessica_Michibata

Wednesday, January 4, 2012

Number 23 : Rola (ローラ)

I don't know why I get such a kick out of mixing up R and L. Or watching how pissed off Bangladeshi's get when you call them Pakistani. Or Indian. It's even better when Indians or Pakistanis mix up their L and Rs. Which brings me back to Rola. When I saw her, the first thing I thought was "She's effing hot". The second thing I thought was "She looks Middle Eastern, I bet she's hairy. Or spends a ton of time and money on laser removal or wax. I wonder if since she's in Japan, does she have a giant bush or what? I've never actually seen an Indian naked, but I bet it looks like Epic Beard Man down there." Then the third thing I thought was "I wonder what her name is?" Then when I found out it was Rola, I almost actually had some yogurt come out my nose. It's like - did her parents conceive her listening to that old Paul Simon song "Lola"? (Which I thought was actually a remake of Weird Al's "Yoda" for most of my early life.) It's funny because I actually met a dude named Lobert. He went by Lob though. His brother's name was Rarry. I thought it was Rory for the longest time. Which is what I thought was a mistaken Lori for the longest time too. Or the rongest time maybe. Maybe that's why my search for "Rong Wang" got blocked by safe search. Oh that will never get old. And neither will my love for Rola. Or her fantastic legs. That may or may not lead up to a giant bush. Which makes me want her even more.


Blog: http://ameblo.jp/rolarola
Facebook: http://www.facebook.com/pages/Rola-ローラ-/252477998102974?sk=wall
Hudie: http://www.hudie.com/b-424856-1-1.html
Peach John: http://www.peachjohn.co.jp/pj/info/rola/rola_back.html
Tumblr: http://fuckyeahrola.tumblr.com (Yeah, that's not her page, but kind of funny.)
Wiki: http://ja.wikipedia.org/wiki/ローラ_(モデル)